How 'Being in Process' Changes Your Life

I know that's a tall order, but read on...

I believe, deep down in the roots of my soul, that ‘The Process’ is where everything happens, grows or dies. It doesn’t happen in the preparation, information, or study (though of course they matter). It doesn’t happen in the final achievement or completed goal (though celebrate like a Knicks fan when it happens!).

Everything happens in the cumulative moments of life - The Processing of day to day. It is in the ordinary richness of our days that we nourish ourselves.

And we often miss it.

This post is about doing our best to be here now…which for many of us is terribly difficult. We are human remember.

We are a society who loves to check boxes (I am one of them). Yet every now and then, and more often lately for me, something stops me from that practice and just wants to be. Be in the moment. Cherishing what’s before me. Joyfully accepting the delight unfolding. I don’t believe we experience this enough. And I want more of it. Do you?

For me - and also for my clients (because they tell me so), I get caught-up in the data sometimes. I have an Oura Ring, I write down all my workouts, timing, reps, heart rate, etc. And I just recently started using an app to track protein (for bone health and strength) and fiber (for gut health and prevention) which led me to realize I wasn’t getting enough carbs on run days…etc. etc.

My point (drug out by all the tracking I realize I do) is that all that data can be helpful OR distracting me from being in my body and being present to the moment.

Which is exactly what a client brought up recently:

How can I be more in the moment and less in my head?

What a spectacular question!!!

As Dr. George Sheehan writes - we are: “…liv[ing] in the might-have-been world of the past and the never-will-be world of the future.” To put this in context and more clearly, what he’s saying is: We often “Refuse to accept our own reality and work with it.”

oh. gulp. true.

So maybe, for the purpose of this post, we start there.

#1. Tell the truth. Be Real. Be honest.

I can share with certainty that the clients who talk truth about what’s going on in their lives (The Process) - more than what they want or wish for (Goal) - they move forward in their well-being journey in a much more rich and meaningful way. (read that again if you need to.) The ones who are tied (literally) to weight loss number goals or performance numbers, get so wrapped up that they miss life.

Don’t get me wrong, goals (mini ones first - please and thank you), can be uber helpful but when we lose sight of the ultimate question, we lose connection with a rich, everyday life: “What do I need to do, think, or eat right now -in this special moment- to truly nourish myself?”

The question invites you to include it in the mini moments of life - in the in-between working and care-taking, cooking and cleaning, writing and reading, doing and being.

When we lose sight of all the mini moments that create our life, we go backwards instead of forward in taking care of our human.

So, back to the question…”How can I be more in the moment and less in my head?”

#2. Practice. Daily.

This can look like rituals, habits, sacred me-time. Like meditation, yoga, journaling, running, training.

Or it can look like an intentional focus and attention of a task. Here is a recent example I have been playing with. I wake up with a to-do list in my head. I wake up wondering if I got enough ideal sleep. I wake up wondering what happened in the world when I was asleep. These are all honest questions AND not really helpful when I first wake up. So I’ve been practicing being with my morning coffee-making ritual (maybe yours is tea). I smell the fresh ground beans, I put may face in the pour-over steam for a teeny-tiny facial and smile, and I really stay present for that first hot taste of bitter coffee that lights me up (not just because of the caffeine, but because of the ritual).

I could certainly think of this experience as mundane, but in reality, this ritual is an anchor and a pleasure for my day. Why not treat it that way!?

One more example that I have shared before here. To help keep us present on our walks, my husband and I carry Awe Stones. When one of us begins a rant or worry about the news, we hold up our stone as a reminder to look, listen, feel, taste, and smell what’s around us. It’s a priceless tool we use to help keep us in the present moment. (By the way, rants still happen sometimes, we are human. That’s ok).

So as the week unfolds, the offering is to notice where you are tight and rigid with your rules and where you could encourage a little bit of pure presence in order to enjoy the process of daily life.

Please share. We would love to hear from you.